I've just been to a performance of the St John Passion by Bach (well, Bach wasn't performing it, but you know what I mean). It was very stirring and inspirational. How could he have written so much fantastic music and how many people has he brought happiness to over all those centuries. What have I done? How annoying are these talented people as, although they make us feel happy, they also make us feel inadequate. It's a double whammy.
The wine and pizza afterwards helped.
So if you haven't reinvented music or strummed tunes that people will be playing for the next four centuries, quickly think of something you can do to make your presence on the planet worthwhile. Time is running out!
'I just can't be bothered to restructure western music today, I think I'll catch up on Eastenders.'
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