Friday 27 March 2009

Blue Sky Thinking II

Read part I first silly!

I've just had a bath and while I was waiting for the conditioner to try to repair some of the damage chlorine has done to my hair, I contemplated what you can do to stave off the boredom of a tedious lecture.

a) You can have a rich inner life and retreat into it while wearing an expression of casual concern, which will be read by the lecturer as 'how can I improve my HR knowledge?'

b) Do your pelvic floor muscle exercises, you know you've been meaning to do them for some time. This will result in an expression of inward concentration, which will make the lecturer pleased.

c) Imagine the lecturer is actually a Matador, wearing snug trousers, broad red cummerbund and a bolero encrusted with bling. The bull is pawing the sand as the Matador cuts a flamboyant swathe with the cloak. Lots of concentration is required to keep this vision alive as the lecturer makes remarks about paragraph b subsection 19(i). The Matador will fling his tricorn hat in the air as he stamps his feet in an arrogant manner:

'take sprocket B squared and apply moderate torque' (yes, you might even find your brain re-lives sections of the Ford Anglia Owner's Manual to avoid the rules of electronic submission of form 9D(iii)).

The crowd get to their feet, roaring their approval, as the tea trolley comes in with one of those seriously disappointing hot water containers that just can't keep the water hot enough to make a decent cup of tea.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hi Hilly - wanted to leave a general comment on all this week's blog, but have ended up here, which isn't to say that this is less funny than the others, in fact I have been laughing out loud for the past 5 mins, despite frantically applying all my repression skills in order not to scare the neighbours. I can see you haven't lost your touch.

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