Blue Stripe Paint

I am fed up with my bathroom. Since I decorated it, and put the new floor down, we need to have a bucket in the sitting room when someone has a shower. I can't say this is much of an improvement on the undecorated bathroom, where the old bit of cheap carpet was obviously holding all the water back. Because the ceiling has been leaking it is now sporting a series of irritating brown stains. I had another bad decorating experience a year or so ago when I tried to paint out some brown stains on the ceiling from another leak. I foolishly bought blue stripe white paint (blue stripe denoting the brand rather than the pattern of the paint - although stripey paint would be very jolly). After about six coats I decided that blue stripe paint was actually invisible paint as the brown stain was still showing through just as clearly. I think I need to invent a new fashion in decorating where brown stains are seen as a decorative asset. Talking of which, the pub across the road spent a lot of money redecorating a few years back, but strangely chose nicotine coloured paint for the ceiling. It didn't look any different by the time they finished. I've since seen quite a few pubs with nicotine coloured paintwork.

It must be time for a new range of colours from Dulux. Out with 'warm neutrals' or 'rich reds' and in with 'nearly nicotine', and 'isn't it time we got the plumber in brown'.