Spend! Spend!

I've just plugged in a new keyboard, and have been out and bought a 'clearance' desk light, so I can now see and type properly, which is bound to enhance my efforts. Mind you, I don't want to see the inside of a shop again for ages, I'm all shopped out.

I remember this feeling in my youth. Father used to take us on 'Spend! Spend!'s where we would have to spend as much as possible in a fairly short time. This was difficult, as there were five of us jostling for use of his one credit card, and he couldn't walk very far due to a motorbike accident that had damaged his leg. Invariably the time ran out, and the only person to have managed to make a purchase was him. He used to get very annoyed with shop assistants if they couldn't find what he wanted, 'I'm trying to spend money here, and you're making it difficult for me', he would exclaim as we all hid, red faced, round the nearest shelves and pretended we weren't with him. We all knew the line that followed, 'Get me the man who can sack you.' Being about 12 or 13 I just wanted to die rather than stand and be associated with this exchange. He would compound the embarrassment by walking up to us and giving us a 'head pat', which a) made it difficult to pretend you didn't know him, and b) ruined any street cred - if any was left at this point. He also had a tendency to sing Bach cantatas at the top of his voice as we walked around. I've never really enjoyed shopping since, although like being able to blend into the crowd when I do go.