I've just spent a week in sunny Spain - and very wonderful it was too. I can't remember when I have spent so much time relaxing.
While relaxing, I found it was easy to invent things that might one day make me very rich......
Firstly, there is the large, rotating platform you desperately need at the bottom of those thatched sunshades on the beach. It would have to have a wide enough diameter to take two sunbeds, and have a winding handle on the supporting pole. You could have a little crank every so often to make sure you are optimising the sun or shade, as appropriate, without the bother of having to attain a vertical attitude which obviously should be reserved only for another icecream or cocktail.
After a while of staring at the underside of the thatch, I found myself thinking about how I needed to paint my ceiling, and how this would be annoying as the drips would land on my furniture. So I invented the inverted paint brush umbrella. A mini upside down umbrella attached to the handle of the brush, so that any drips are caught in the fabric as you paint your ceiling. No more worrying about whether your suite is going to look like it came off the set of '101 Dalmations'.
Having spent a disappointingly long time in a queue at the airport on the way home, I found myself wondering why EasyJet don't produce their own in flight bag, to the exact dimensions of their testing cage arrangements (I was a bit anxious that my holiday shopping had been rather ambitious for hand luggage).
After a lot longer in the hot queue to get on the plane, I decided the bag could come with a pocket, ready filled with stamped, addressed cards to the Chief Executive of EasyJet, and a pen tied to the zip fastener, so you can easily write your complaints and have them ready to post on return to your home country.
After even longer in the queue, I thought the bag could have an inflatable armchair attached, then maybe even a bed, with a pull out blanket on an inertia roll like seatbelts in cars.
When the queue eventually started to move, painfully slowly, I invented the travelator extension, that moved every passenger to their seat, ejected them into the sitting position, while a metallic arm punches out from the ground and bounces the above mentioned bag into the overhead locker. This would be a fully automated system, so that everyone would be seated in the minimum time, and offer no opportunity to dither over 'aisle or window', 'over the wing or at the front' etc etc yawn yawn can't you get a move on some of us are hot and bothered here.
Getting off was just as tedious, it was hard to understand why the mobile corridor operative had only just realised we had taxied into a parking space half an hour after arrival, when air traffic control must have known we were coming for the past three hours.
I haven't invented a cure for that one yet, but I am working on it.
While relaxing, I found it was easy to invent things that might one day make me very rich......
Firstly, there is the large, rotating platform you desperately need at the bottom of those thatched sunshades on the beach. It would have to have a wide enough diameter to take two sunbeds, and have a winding handle on the supporting pole. You could have a little crank every so often to make sure you are optimising the sun or shade, as appropriate, without the bother of having to attain a vertical attitude which obviously should be reserved only for another icecream or cocktail.
After a while of staring at the underside of the thatch, I found myself thinking about how I needed to paint my ceiling, and how this would be annoying as the drips would land on my furniture. So I invented the inverted paint brush umbrella. A mini upside down umbrella attached to the handle of the brush, so that any drips are caught in the fabric as you paint your ceiling. No more worrying about whether your suite is going to look like it came off the set of '101 Dalmations'.
Having spent a disappointingly long time in a queue at the airport on the way home, I found myself wondering why EasyJet don't produce their own in flight bag, to the exact dimensions of their testing cage arrangements (I was a bit anxious that my holiday shopping had been rather ambitious for hand luggage).
After a lot longer in the hot queue to get on the plane, I decided the bag could come with a pocket, ready filled with stamped, addressed cards to the Chief Executive of EasyJet, and a pen tied to the zip fastener, so you can easily write your complaints and have them ready to post on return to your home country.
After even longer in the queue, I thought the bag could have an inflatable armchair attached, then maybe even a bed, with a pull out blanket on an inertia roll like seatbelts in cars.
When the queue eventually started to move, painfully slowly, I invented the travelator extension, that moved every passenger to their seat, ejected them into the sitting position, while a metallic arm punches out from the ground and bounces the above mentioned bag into the overhead locker. This would be a fully automated system, so that everyone would be seated in the minimum time, and offer no opportunity to dither over 'aisle or window', 'over the wing or at the front' etc etc yawn yawn can't you get a move on some of us are hot and bothered here.
Getting off was just as tedious, it was hard to understand why the mobile corridor operative had only just realised we had taxied into a parking space half an hour after arrival, when air traffic control must have known we were coming for the past three hours.
I haven't invented a cure for that one yet, but I am working on it.
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